FIC: Many Precious Things [2/?]
Sep. 1st, 2008 09:49 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
leashy_bebesTitle: Many Precious Things [Chapter 2]
Author: Lyds
Rating: This part, G
Notes: Introducing...James! He's still a kid though, hold your horses ;)
Disclaimer: JKR’s, not mine. Title is from an Elvis Costello song, When It Sings, and that's not mine either.
Words: ~4000 [this part]
Teddy wakes up with an abrupt jolt and realises that he is running late. It's already half nine, and he has a lot to do today. With a regretful groan he hauls himself out of bed and stumbles towards the bathroom. He still loves to lie in as late as possible, and having to get up early when there's no one there to tell him to do it seems particularly cruel. Still though, he reflects as the water cascading over his body brings him fully awake, it should be a good day. The report and clutch of practical demonstrations he is going to drop off should get his boss off his back for at least a week. Teddy works in research, and although he loves the job, it is not what he had imagined. He seems to spend far more time writing things down in outdated, formulaic ways than he spends tinkering with charms, which was how he had, probably naively, pictured his future.
Then he'll go from work to his grandmother's for an hour or so. He misses her a lot, and knows that she misses him too. She always looks almost heartbreakingly glad to see him, smiles hugely, and chats away to him while they drink tea. Usually, she will force some manner of food on him over his protests that he's really not hungry. Often it's sandwiches, but she makes a mean caraway cake, and that's always a possibility.
Afterwards, he'll floo into the Potters' for the rest of the afternoon, and maybe stay over. He hasn't done that in a while, not since all three of the kids have been at school. Now they're home for the summer, Teddy tries to spend part of each weekend with the Potters, and drops in a few times a week. He misses the kids more than he would expect while they're away, and even finds himself missing the chaos. He still sees Harry and Ginny fairly often, sometimes meeting Harry after work for a beer or a firewhisky. It feels a bit strange to go out drinking with his godfather, but Teddy often has to remind himself how old he is. It's a bit of a running joke with his adopted family. He still groups himself in with the kids rather than the adults, and even though he has a flat and a job and all the trimmings of a grown up life, sometimes he doesn't feel old enough for any of it.
When he'd moved out of his grandmother's, Harry had offered Teddy a room and made the mistake of doing it in James' hearing. For Teddy, taking the room had never been an option, even if Harry had been willing to accept some rent. The whole point of moving out was to be independent, and anyway, there's such a thing as privacy. It had been a near thing though, because James had overheard - eavesdropped if Teddy knows him like he thinks he does - and pleaded with Teddy every day for a week to move in with them. Whether it's Teddy can you make your hair yellow, can you, can you or Teddy can we go flying, can we, can we, or Teddy can I have a biscuit, can I, can I, Teddy has always had a hard time saying no to James. The boy is just so easily affectionate, so open and friendly. Teddy laughs uncomfortably now to remember his childhood fears about James not liking him, because James had adored him, almost from birth.
In fact, Teddy likes all of Harry's children, and they like him. Albus is a little more reserved than James and Lily but sometimes, with Teddy, he steps out of the quiet middle child role he seems to have carved out for himself and is passionate and smart, and a much deeper thinker than his brother, from a very young age. Teddy doesn't think anyone except Harry and maybe Lily can really claim to be close to Albus, and often gets the impression that Al tolerates more people than he actually likes. He'd been briefly, intensely devastated to be sorted into Slytherin but that particular issue seems to be well behind him now. He's thriving at Hogwarts, and not nearly as shy as he used to be.
Lily is just sweetness personified. She is full of hugs and giggles and simply ignores any kind of negativity so intensely that it usually dissipates by virtue of her iron will. She adores her brothers, particularly Albus, and purposely doesn't notice when he gets irritated with her trailing around after him all summer. Recently she's become obsessed with Quidditch, and Teddy makes a mental note to grab the magazine he'd picked up for her the other day before he leaves. She's just finished her first year at Hogwarts and has decided that she wants to try out for beater next term, and Teddy thinks she certainly has the aim – and the arm – for it.
Still grinning at the recollection of James' startled face as he caught Lily's bludger with his stomach in last weekend's impromptu Quidditch game, Teddy apparates into work. He gets the shock of his life when he hears music blaring and smells coffee and bacon rolls.
"Lupin!" A voice calls and Teddy turns to see Lorraine Jenkins, a muggle-born Potions researcher who shares Teddy's cramped office.
"Hello, you," he smiles. "What on earth are you doing here on a Saturday?"
"They do not pay me enough," she grumbles, handing Teddy a mug of coffee.
"Don't pay any of us enough," Teddy agrees. "What's going on?"
"They've cut my lab access by half," Lorraine says, "I spent all yesterday kicking up a stink about it, pissed off the wrong person and got a demand at four on Friday evening for a theoretical and analytical report on my recent progress by Monday morning."
"Merlin! What a joke..." Teddy shakes his head and sighs. He does love the job, but it's run by the most ridiculous, back-biting bureaucrats in the world. He'd avoided the ministry to avoid just such people, but apparently they were everywhere.
"I know. Still, I've colonised the whole office, it’s actually quite nice when there's no one else here. Speaking of, what are you doing?"
"Dropping off a report," Teddy says, hefting the folder and small case at his side. "And some samples."
"Ooh, sample whats?" Lorraine asks, perking up a little. Although she often derides them as useless compared to her subtle potions, she is always intrigued by Teddy's charmed objects.
"Well the report’s on a variant on a tickling charm that could be used diagnostically with a bit more work on it."
"Diagnostically?" Lorraine asks sceptically.
"Identifying spell or nerve damage. Particularly good for kids, because they get scared of the poking. Tickling's easier for them to deal with."
"You great softy," Lorraine says, but she smiles while she says it and Teddy nods.
"And this," Teddy says, opening the box with a little flourish, "You will take the piss out of mercilessly, but would sell like hot cakes." He pulls out a tiny flower, fashioned from glass with white silk petals.
"Oh, please," Lorraine says, but Teddy waves it under her nose and she smiles a relaxed smile in spite of herself. "What's that?" she asks dreamily.
"Sense specific charms. I got the idea from Amortentia. It smells like whatever smells best to you, right? So why can't a charm do that? It's still really simple at the moment, and possibly a bit too strong. It's just relaxing at the moment, but I think I could get them for a range of emotions and set up some sort of reciprocal feedback loop with the person's - "
"Alright, alright!" Lorraine laughs, holding up a hand. "My eyes are going to glaze over. It smells very nice, well done on the pretty little flower."
"Cow," Teddy grins, packing the flower away and placing the case and file in the safe box behind the main desk. He drains his coffee mug and cleans it with a quick wave of his wand then leans over Lorraine's shoulder to point out a spelling mistake in her report, taking advantage of her distraction to grab her bacon roll and take a bite. She slaps his hand and grabs it back from him.
"Get your own bloody breakfast," she says, poking her tongue out at him.
"Yeah, yeah. Right, I'm off to see the family," he says. "I'll see you Monday."
"No you won't," Lorraine counters. "I'll be dropping the report off and going home to bed," she adds balefully.
"Good plan. You should work from home more often," Teddy says cheekily, knowing that unlike hers, his work is generally safe enough to be done away from the office or supervised areas. She throws a balled up piece of parchment at him but he apparates away before it can hit him.
The hour he spends at his grandmother's house is as welcome a respite from the real world as ever. She asks him about work, and tells him about her friends, and true to form, there is a large caraway cake waiting in the living room. She hands him a slice with his cup of tea and it is perfect; fragrant and moist and sweet. She is still witty and well dressed, her hair neatly bundled at the back of her neck, but Teddy is suddenly struck by the thought that she looks old.
And yet just as he thinks that, she looks at him shrewdly and asks if he has found himself a special someone yet. He chokes on his cake and flushes red, shaking his head. She laughs and hands him a napkin which he presses to his streaming eyes. She never mentions his brief relationship with Victoire, and is remarkably non-gender specific whenever she asks about his non-existent special someone. Sometimes he is just tempted to ask her if she knows, but he inevitably squirms away from the idea and changes the subject.
"Oh, here," he says, digging in the pocket of his jacket. "I made you this. An early prototype." Grinning cheekily at her, Teddy swoops down to one knee in front of his grandmother, holding up a flower like the one he'd shown Lorraine. This one is larger, the petals a deep red this time and it is charmed to smell like any of her three favourite perfumes depending on which she wears. In truth, he'd found himself working more diligently on this one than on the samples for his boss, but that's often the case and he's never got in trouble for it before.
Today she is wearing vanilla, and the smell echoes back from the flower, reminding Teddy of summer and childhood and happiness.
"Oh, darling!" she says, and he presses it into her hand. "It's lovely."
"It'll change with your other perfumes," he says, and she leans down to kiss his cheek.
"You're so clever," she says, and Teddy feels himself squirm in the same way he always has at hearing those words. "Don't look like that; I'm very pleased you've found something you enjoy, and that you're good at."
"Thanks, Gran," he says, giving her an awkward grin.
"Up, boy," she orders, pushing at him. "Hadn't you better be off to Harry's?"
"Yeah, probably," Teddy acknowledges, glancing at his watch. "Definitely. Can I use your floo?"
"Of course."
"Alright, I better get off. Thanks for the tea. And the cake!"
"Come by in the week, I'll make you one to take home."
"Brilliant, thanks!" he says, and she stands up and walks him to the floo. They hug for a moment and she kisses his cheek again as he takes a deep breath, bracing himself for the transition from his Grandmother's peace and quiet to the bedlam that is a fully stocked Potter household.
Sure enough he has barely stepped out of the floo when a red haired blur shoots across the room and collides with him at waist height.
“Teddy, Teddy, Teddy! Hi!” Lily says breathlessly.
“Hello, beautiful, you alright?” Teddy asks, getting his balance before giving Lily a quick hug and a kiss on the forehead.
“Yeah, good! My friend Louise is coming tomorrow night will you stay and meet her please Teddy please, I told her all about you and – ”
“Lily!” Ginny admonishes from the doorway. “Let the poor boy catch his breath. Hi, Teddy.”
“Alright, Ginny?” he nods, smiling at her over Lily’s head.
“Oh, you know. Frazzled,” she admits, ginning at him. “Harry’ll be in from the garden in a minute, he’s talking to James.”
“He’s monody,” Lily interjects.
“That’s right,” Ginny agrees. “Had a face on him ever since he got home from school, hasn’t he?”
"Longer," Lily grouses.
“That’s not like him,” Teddy says, frowning.
Ginny shrugs and starts to say something but at that point both Harry and Albus walk in, followed a minute later by James. Sitting down around the large, familiar wooden table in the Potters’ kitchen for a drink – Teddy remembers lying underneath it as a kid, either reading or colouring, or just playing – everything seems fairly normal, and if James is a little quieter than usual, Lily more than makes up for him. James isn't completely silent, but he's not his usual cheeky, smart-mouthed self either, and when he smiles across the table at Teddy it's just a little bit lacklustre. Teddy wonders if he should try to find out what's wrong with him.
As the kids are finishing their pumpkin juice, Harry says, "Can I borrow you, Teddy? I need an extra wand."
"Oh, sure," Teddy says, swallowing the last of his tea and following Harry out into the garden.
"How's work?" Harry asks.
"Good," Teddy nods. "I'm glad I'm out of the office a lot though, it sounds like it's been a nightmare lately."
"Oh, politics," Harry says with a rueful smile. "Listen, I don't really an extra wand. I wanted to ask you to have a word with James. He's been in a funny mood since he got home from school and he won't tell us what's wrong."
"Oh..."
"Well, you know he's always been your number one fan, I thought he might open up to you. If you're not - "
"No, that's fine," Teddy assures him. "I was going to speak to him anyway, this isn't like him."
"Brilliant, thanks Ted."
"No problem," Teddy says with a smile and follows Harry back inside where he is immediately monopolised by Lily for the next quarter of an hour as soon as he hands her the Quidditch magazine. She waxes lyrical about the Harpies' chances for the coming season, and describes in great detail her excitement when some of Ginny's old team mates had come for dinner. Finally, Ginny shoots Teddy a grin and distracts Lily for long enough that Teddy can slip outside.
At the back of the garden, there is a stone bench in the shade, and it's James' favourite spot. Sure enough he's sprawled in the cool grass in front of the bench, leaning back against it and staring off into nowhere.
"Hey, James," Teddy says, throwing himself onto the grass next to James and casting a casual look at him. James is normally a cheerful, simple soul, and it's clear to see that something important is troubling him.
"Hi, Ted," James says with a half-hearted smile. "Good hair."
"You always say that," Teddy says, shifting his hair from purple to red to blue and back again.
"Show off," James says, but he smiles a bit wider.
"D'you want to come and see my flat some time in the summer?" Teddy suggests. "We'll have a day out in London and you can come for dinner."
"Yeah!" James says enthusiastically.
"Alright," Teddy grins. "I'll talk to your dad, we'll sort it out."
"Thanks."
"So, what have you been doing?" Teddy asks.
"Nothing much," James shrugs. "Not homework anyway."
"Makes a change," Teddy says, nudging James who smiles again. It looks like a proper smile but Teddy knows James very well and it is not James' proper smile. There's definitely something wrong and Teddy feels a surge of protectiveness. "Been writing to Jack?" Jack McGinn is James' fellow Gryffindor third-soon-to-be-fourth year and best friend. They've been inseparable since their first year and spend at least a week at each others' houses in the summer, getting under parental feet and causing mischief and mayhem.
"Um - not - yeah, a bit," James says, and Teddy notes with surprise that he has gone red and is staring at the ground intently.
"Did you have a fight?" Teddy probes.
"No, I just - nothing."
James starts tugging up blades of grass, twisting and crushing them in his fingers, staining the tips green. When there's a small bald patch in the lawn, James presses his finger into the dirt and twists it around. Teddy reaches over and tugs his hand up, shaking it by gripping James' muddy finger and wiggling it around.
"Stop that, your mum'll go spare."
"No she won't," James contradicts. "It's already a mess from Quidditch, anyway."
"Jamie-face, what's wrong?" Teddy asks gently.
"Nothing," James says, but Teddy can hear his heart isn't in the lie, so he just waits. "I just - I think there's something wrong with me," he whispers, so soft Teddy can hardly hear it, and that is definitely not like James.
"What do you mean?"
There's a long silence, and Teddy becomes aware that James' breathing is uneven. James tugs his sleeves down over his hands and then pushes them up to his elbows a second later before crossing his arms tightly over his chest. Teddy frowns, starting to get genuinely worried. James Sirius Potter is never nervous, and never knowingly self-conscious, not in living memory, but he looks perfectly terrified now, pressing his lips tightly closed and twisting his grass stained fingers together.
"I think I - I don't - I can't, Teddy."
"Can't what, mate?"
"Say it," James whispers.
Another sideways glance reveals that James' eyes are starting to swim with moisture. Teddy deliberately looks away to allow James time to dash the tears from his eyes before they start to fall.
"James, you can tell me anything, and I'll try to help you," Teddy promises and almost before he finishes the sentence James speaks, his voice barely audible.
"I think I like boys," he says, and he sounds so scared and alone and heartsick that Teddy's chest aches for him.
"Did you and Jack have a fight about that?" Teddy asks, concern flaring again and James shakes his head, flushing that dark red colour again.
"I like him," he whispers. "Teddy, I hate it! I don't - want to," he grits out and Teddy grabs his wrist gently as he starts worrying the lawn again.
"James, there's nothing wrong with it," he says gently.
"I know that’s what you’re supposed to say," James says, shaking his head, "but - I don’t - why me? What happened?"
"Nothing happened, mate, it's just - it's not something you have a choice about, and it's not something you should have to change even if that was possible.”
“It’s stupid,” James grits out.
“What is?”
“All of it! I don’t want to like anyone and it’s not like I want – I don’t even know – ” He’s an even darker red than before now, and he actually looks a little sick, so Teddy reaches over and lays a hand on his shoulder. James is so tense that he’s practically vibrating and Teddy squeezes his shoulder once before backing off a bit.
“Look, all I know is that there’s not a single thing wrong with you, James. If you ever want to talk to me – ”
James shakes his head fiercely and then a few seconds later, blurts out, “What am I going to do?”
“What about?” Teddy asks gently.
“Jack,” James says as though it’s obvious, and Teddy supposes it is really. Merlin knows there’s probably nothing more important to James right now. “I don’t – stupid sod’s not even – argh.”
“‘Argh’?” Teddy asks, and he can’t help a tiny smile.
“Yes, argh,” James says, reaching out to punch Teddy’s leg. “He likes girls, Teddy. A lot. They don’t like him cause he’s not even that good looking so I don’t know why I even care but he still follows them around all over the place and talks about them all the time and – it’s crap. I don’t know what to do.”
Teddy’s a little unsure what James means and says so, asking if he’s planning to tell Jack how he feels.
“Merlin, no!” James says vehemently. “I don’t even want to feel like it, let alone do anything about it. It’s just…difficult. Like it’s not even my thoughts, but I can’t help – it’s pretty gross, really.”
“No it’s not,” Teddy says with a gentle laugh. “Everything’s gross when you’re thirteen and have a crush on it.”
“It?” James says with a sudden grin. “You’re gross, Teddy. It? It like a Hippogriff or it like a chair?”
“You know what I mean. I know they’re your least favourite words ever, but when you're older, it won’t be so strange. I mean, it might still be strange but it won’t be gross."
"Huh," James grunts, evidently not believing him.
Teddy looks away and bites his lip for a moment, all too aware that this could backfire spectacularly. He probably shouldn't do it, but James just seems so desolate and different, as though he's pulled back from everyone and everything, as though he's smaller.
"Do you think I'm gross?" Teddy asks, still not looking at James.
"Yeah, Teddy. You like Hippogriffs," James jokes.
"James," Teddy says quietly. "Do you think there's something wrong with me?"
There's an increasingly heavy silence until understanding obviously dawns and James squeaks, "What? But - you - Victoire - "
"It's - complicated," Teddy shrugs. There's a limit to how much of himself he's willing to reveal, especially to an already confused thirteen year old. "I'm a bit stupid."
"Wow. Wow," James says. "I - huh… So - huh. This is so weird. I know this sounds really stupid but I kind of thought I was the only one. Even though I knew I wasn't."
"I know," Teddy agrees and James shakes his head in apparent amazement.
"Well," James says and Teddy's relieved to see the beginnings of a real smile on his face. "You're not a complete freak - " Teddy can't resist such an obvious cue and promptly rearranges his features to look like an old woman, complete with warts and rotting teeth. "Urgh. Except for that stuff, obviously," James grins.
"Feel better?" Teddy asks, reverting to his own face. "I know it doesn't help with Jack, but - "
"Loads better," James nods. "Thanks, Teddy."
"No problem," Teddy says. "Look, James. I haven’t told many people yet so can you keep this to yourself for a bit? Not for long," he adds at James' thoroughly put-out expression. "I want to tell your dad myself."
"Dad doesn't know?"
"Not yet."
"You told me first?"
"Well - not quite first, but yeah."
"Cool," James grins, and Teddy grabs him in a one armed hug and ruffles his hair. James hugs him back briefly then wriggles away. "Don't tell anyone about me," he says, as though struck suddenly by the thought.
"James. Of course not."
"You're the best," James says, bounding to his feet. "I'm hungry, come on."
Teddy shakes his head, wondering at the kid's resilience, and pushes himself upright, following James towards the house.
"Dad told you to talk to me, didn't he?" James asks as they approach the back door.
"Er - "
"I don't mind," James says. "I know I've been horrible."
"They’ve just been worried," Teddy says gently. "Just try to cheer up a bit, enjoy your summer."
"Yeah," James says, almost wistfully. Then he looks at Teddy with a thoughtful frown and says more definitely, "Yeah!"
Teddy ruffles his hair again and James ducks, shoving him in the side.
"Oi!" Teddy yells, and lunges for James who lets out a shout of laughter and dashes into the house, ducking behind his mum, who swats him away. He circles around her and out of the kitchen, laughing all the way.
Ginny looks at Teddy with raised eyebrows and a stunned expression.
“Miracle worker,” she says. “Sent by Merlin himself, I swear, you are. Anything you want for your birthday this year, honestly.”
Teddy just laughs and follows the sound of James, Lily and Albus’ burgeoning argument.
[Interlude 2]
Author: Lyds
Rating: This part, G
Notes: Introducing...James! He's still a kid though, hold your horses ;)
Disclaimer: JKR’s, not mine. Title is from an Elvis Costello song, When It Sings, and that's not mine either.
Words: ~4000 [this part]
Teddy wakes up with an abrupt jolt and realises that he is running late. It's already half nine, and he has a lot to do today. With a regretful groan he hauls himself out of bed and stumbles towards the bathroom. He still loves to lie in as late as possible, and having to get up early when there's no one there to tell him to do it seems particularly cruel. Still though, he reflects as the water cascading over his body brings him fully awake, it should be a good day. The report and clutch of practical demonstrations he is going to drop off should get his boss off his back for at least a week. Teddy works in research, and although he loves the job, it is not what he had imagined. He seems to spend far more time writing things down in outdated, formulaic ways than he spends tinkering with charms, which was how he had, probably naively, pictured his future.
Then he'll go from work to his grandmother's for an hour or so. He misses her a lot, and knows that she misses him too. She always looks almost heartbreakingly glad to see him, smiles hugely, and chats away to him while they drink tea. Usually, she will force some manner of food on him over his protests that he's really not hungry. Often it's sandwiches, but she makes a mean caraway cake, and that's always a possibility.
Afterwards, he'll floo into the Potters' for the rest of the afternoon, and maybe stay over. He hasn't done that in a while, not since all three of the kids have been at school. Now they're home for the summer, Teddy tries to spend part of each weekend with the Potters, and drops in a few times a week. He misses the kids more than he would expect while they're away, and even finds himself missing the chaos. He still sees Harry and Ginny fairly often, sometimes meeting Harry after work for a beer or a firewhisky. It feels a bit strange to go out drinking with his godfather, but Teddy often has to remind himself how old he is. It's a bit of a running joke with his adopted family. He still groups himself in with the kids rather than the adults, and even though he has a flat and a job and all the trimmings of a grown up life, sometimes he doesn't feel old enough for any of it.
When he'd moved out of his grandmother's, Harry had offered Teddy a room and made the mistake of doing it in James' hearing. For Teddy, taking the room had never been an option, even if Harry had been willing to accept some rent. The whole point of moving out was to be independent, and anyway, there's such a thing as privacy. It had been a near thing though, because James had overheard - eavesdropped if Teddy knows him like he thinks he does - and pleaded with Teddy every day for a week to move in with them. Whether it's Teddy can you make your hair yellow, can you, can you or Teddy can we go flying, can we, can we, or Teddy can I have a biscuit, can I, can I, Teddy has always had a hard time saying no to James. The boy is just so easily affectionate, so open and friendly. Teddy laughs uncomfortably now to remember his childhood fears about James not liking him, because James had adored him, almost from birth.
In fact, Teddy likes all of Harry's children, and they like him. Albus is a little more reserved than James and Lily but sometimes, with Teddy, he steps out of the quiet middle child role he seems to have carved out for himself and is passionate and smart, and a much deeper thinker than his brother, from a very young age. Teddy doesn't think anyone except Harry and maybe Lily can really claim to be close to Albus, and often gets the impression that Al tolerates more people than he actually likes. He'd been briefly, intensely devastated to be sorted into Slytherin but that particular issue seems to be well behind him now. He's thriving at Hogwarts, and not nearly as shy as he used to be.
Lily is just sweetness personified. She is full of hugs and giggles and simply ignores any kind of negativity so intensely that it usually dissipates by virtue of her iron will. She adores her brothers, particularly Albus, and purposely doesn't notice when he gets irritated with her trailing around after him all summer. Recently she's become obsessed with Quidditch, and Teddy makes a mental note to grab the magazine he'd picked up for her the other day before he leaves. She's just finished her first year at Hogwarts and has decided that she wants to try out for beater next term, and Teddy thinks she certainly has the aim – and the arm – for it.
Still grinning at the recollection of James' startled face as he caught Lily's bludger with his stomach in last weekend's impromptu Quidditch game, Teddy apparates into work. He gets the shock of his life when he hears music blaring and smells coffee and bacon rolls.
"Lupin!" A voice calls and Teddy turns to see Lorraine Jenkins, a muggle-born Potions researcher who shares Teddy's cramped office.
"Hello, you," he smiles. "What on earth are you doing here on a Saturday?"
"They do not pay me enough," she grumbles, handing Teddy a mug of coffee.
"Don't pay any of us enough," Teddy agrees. "What's going on?"
"They've cut my lab access by half," Lorraine says, "I spent all yesterday kicking up a stink about it, pissed off the wrong person and got a demand at four on Friday evening for a theoretical and analytical report on my recent progress by Monday morning."
"Merlin! What a joke..." Teddy shakes his head and sighs. He does love the job, but it's run by the most ridiculous, back-biting bureaucrats in the world. He'd avoided the ministry to avoid just such people, but apparently they were everywhere.
"I know. Still, I've colonised the whole office, it’s actually quite nice when there's no one else here. Speaking of, what are you doing?"
"Dropping off a report," Teddy says, hefting the folder and small case at his side. "And some samples."
"Ooh, sample whats?" Lorraine asks, perking up a little. Although she often derides them as useless compared to her subtle potions, she is always intrigued by Teddy's charmed objects.
"Well the report’s on a variant on a tickling charm that could be used diagnostically with a bit more work on it."
"Diagnostically?" Lorraine asks sceptically.
"Identifying spell or nerve damage. Particularly good for kids, because they get scared of the poking. Tickling's easier for them to deal with."
"You great softy," Lorraine says, but she smiles while she says it and Teddy nods.
"And this," Teddy says, opening the box with a little flourish, "You will take the piss out of mercilessly, but would sell like hot cakes." He pulls out a tiny flower, fashioned from glass with white silk petals.
"Oh, please," Lorraine says, but Teddy waves it under her nose and she smiles a relaxed smile in spite of herself. "What's that?" she asks dreamily.
"Sense specific charms. I got the idea from Amortentia. It smells like whatever smells best to you, right? So why can't a charm do that? It's still really simple at the moment, and possibly a bit too strong. It's just relaxing at the moment, but I think I could get them for a range of emotions and set up some sort of reciprocal feedback loop with the person's - "
"Alright, alright!" Lorraine laughs, holding up a hand. "My eyes are going to glaze over. It smells very nice, well done on the pretty little flower."
"Cow," Teddy grins, packing the flower away and placing the case and file in the safe box behind the main desk. He drains his coffee mug and cleans it with a quick wave of his wand then leans over Lorraine's shoulder to point out a spelling mistake in her report, taking advantage of her distraction to grab her bacon roll and take a bite. She slaps his hand and grabs it back from him.
"Get your own bloody breakfast," she says, poking her tongue out at him.
"Yeah, yeah. Right, I'm off to see the family," he says. "I'll see you Monday."
"No you won't," Lorraine counters. "I'll be dropping the report off and going home to bed," she adds balefully.
"Good plan. You should work from home more often," Teddy says cheekily, knowing that unlike hers, his work is generally safe enough to be done away from the office or supervised areas. She throws a balled up piece of parchment at him but he apparates away before it can hit him.
The hour he spends at his grandmother's house is as welcome a respite from the real world as ever. She asks him about work, and tells him about her friends, and true to form, there is a large caraway cake waiting in the living room. She hands him a slice with his cup of tea and it is perfect; fragrant and moist and sweet. She is still witty and well dressed, her hair neatly bundled at the back of her neck, but Teddy is suddenly struck by the thought that she looks old.
And yet just as he thinks that, she looks at him shrewdly and asks if he has found himself a special someone yet. He chokes on his cake and flushes red, shaking his head. She laughs and hands him a napkin which he presses to his streaming eyes. She never mentions his brief relationship with Victoire, and is remarkably non-gender specific whenever she asks about his non-existent special someone. Sometimes he is just tempted to ask her if she knows, but he inevitably squirms away from the idea and changes the subject.
"Oh, here," he says, digging in the pocket of his jacket. "I made you this. An early prototype." Grinning cheekily at her, Teddy swoops down to one knee in front of his grandmother, holding up a flower like the one he'd shown Lorraine. This one is larger, the petals a deep red this time and it is charmed to smell like any of her three favourite perfumes depending on which she wears. In truth, he'd found himself working more diligently on this one than on the samples for his boss, but that's often the case and he's never got in trouble for it before.
Today she is wearing vanilla, and the smell echoes back from the flower, reminding Teddy of summer and childhood and happiness.
"Oh, darling!" she says, and he presses it into her hand. "It's lovely."
"It'll change with your other perfumes," he says, and she leans down to kiss his cheek.
"You're so clever," she says, and Teddy feels himself squirm in the same way he always has at hearing those words. "Don't look like that; I'm very pleased you've found something you enjoy, and that you're good at."
"Thanks, Gran," he says, giving her an awkward grin.
"Up, boy," she orders, pushing at him. "Hadn't you better be off to Harry's?"
"Yeah, probably," Teddy acknowledges, glancing at his watch. "Definitely. Can I use your floo?"
"Of course."
"Alright, I better get off. Thanks for the tea. And the cake!"
"Come by in the week, I'll make you one to take home."
"Brilliant, thanks!" he says, and she stands up and walks him to the floo. They hug for a moment and she kisses his cheek again as he takes a deep breath, bracing himself for the transition from his Grandmother's peace and quiet to the bedlam that is a fully stocked Potter household.
Sure enough he has barely stepped out of the floo when a red haired blur shoots across the room and collides with him at waist height.
“Teddy, Teddy, Teddy! Hi!” Lily says breathlessly.
“Hello, beautiful, you alright?” Teddy asks, getting his balance before giving Lily a quick hug and a kiss on the forehead.
“Yeah, good! My friend Louise is coming tomorrow night will you stay and meet her please Teddy please, I told her all about you and – ”
“Lily!” Ginny admonishes from the doorway. “Let the poor boy catch his breath. Hi, Teddy.”
“Alright, Ginny?” he nods, smiling at her over Lily’s head.
“Oh, you know. Frazzled,” she admits, ginning at him. “Harry’ll be in from the garden in a minute, he’s talking to James.”
“He’s monody,” Lily interjects.
“That’s right,” Ginny agrees. “Had a face on him ever since he got home from school, hasn’t he?”
"Longer," Lily grouses.
“That’s not like him,” Teddy says, frowning.
Ginny shrugs and starts to say something but at that point both Harry and Albus walk in, followed a minute later by James. Sitting down around the large, familiar wooden table in the Potters’ kitchen for a drink – Teddy remembers lying underneath it as a kid, either reading or colouring, or just playing – everything seems fairly normal, and if James is a little quieter than usual, Lily more than makes up for him. James isn't completely silent, but he's not his usual cheeky, smart-mouthed self either, and when he smiles across the table at Teddy it's just a little bit lacklustre. Teddy wonders if he should try to find out what's wrong with him.
As the kids are finishing their pumpkin juice, Harry says, "Can I borrow you, Teddy? I need an extra wand."
"Oh, sure," Teddy says, swallowing the last of his tea and following Harry out into the garden.
"How's work?" Harry asks.
"Good," Teddy nods. "I'm glad I'm out of the office a lot though, it sounds like it's been a nightmare lately."
"Oh, politics," Harry says with a rueful smile. "Listen, I don't really an extra wand. I wanted to ask you to have a word with James. He's been in a funny mood since he got home from school and he won't tell us what's wrong."
"Oh..."
"Well, you know he's always been your number one fan, I thought he might open up to you. If you're not - "
"No, that's fine," Teddy assures him. "I was going to speak to him anyway, this isn't like him."
"Brilliant, thanks Ted."
"No problem," Teddy says with a smile and follows Harry back inside where he is immediately monopolised by Lily for the next quarter of an hour as soon as he hands her the Quidditch magazine. She waxes lyrical about the Harpies' chances for the coming season, and describes in great detail her excitement when some of Ginny's old team mates had come for dinner. Finally, Ginny shoots Teddy a grin and distracts Lily for long enough that Teddy can slip outside.
At the back of the garden, there is a stone bench in the shade, and it's James' favourite spot. Sure enough he's sprawled in the cool grass in front of the bench, leaning back against it and staring off into nowhere.
"Hey, James," Teddy says, throwing himself onto the grass next to James and casting a casual look at him. James is normally a cheerful, simple soul, and it's clear to see that something important is troubling him.
"Hi, Ted," James says with a half-hearted smile. "Good hair."
"You always say that," Teddy says, shifting his hair from purple to red to blue and back again.
"Show off," James says, but he smiles a bit wider.
"D'you want to come and see my flat some time in the summer?" Teddy suggests. "We'll have a day out in London and you can come for dinner."
"Yeah!" James says enthusiastically.
"Alright," Teddy grins. "I'll talk to your dad, we'll sort it out."
"Thanks."
"So, what have you been doing?" Teddy asks.
"Nothing much," James shrugs. "Not homework anyway."
"Makes a change," Teddy says, nudging James who smiles again. It looks like a proper smile but Teddy knows James very well and it is not James' proper smile. There's definitely something wrong and Teddy feels a surge of protectiveness. "Been writing to Jack?" Jack McGinn is James' fellow Gryffindor third-soon-to-be-fourth year and best friend. They've been inseparable since their first year and spend at least a week at each others' houses in the summer, getting under parental feet and causing mischief and mayhem.
"Um - not - yeah, a bit," James says, and Teddy notes with surprise that he has gone red and is staring at the ground intently.
"Did you have a fight?" Teddy probes.
"No, I just - nothing."
James starts tugging up blades of grass, twisting and crushing them in his fingers, staining the tips green. When there's a small bald patch in the lawn, James presses his finger into the dirt and twists it around. Teddy reaches over and tugs his hand up, shaking it by gripping James' muddy finger and wiggling it around.
"Stop that, your mum'll go spare."
"No she won't," James contradicts. "It's already a mess from Quidditch, anyway."
"Jamie-face, what's wrong?" Teddy asks gently.
"Nothing," James says, but Teddy can hear his heart isn't in the lie, so he just waits. "I just - I think there's something wrong with me," he whispers, so soft Teddy can hardly hear it, and that is definitely not like James.
"What do you mean?"
There's a long silence, and Teddy becomes aware that James' breathing is uneven. James tugs his sleeves down over his hands and then pushes them up to his elbows a second later before crossing his arms tightly over his chest. Teddy frowns, starting to get genuinely worried. James Sirius Potter is never nervous, and never knowingly self-conscious, not in living memory, but he looks perfectly terrified now, pressing his lips tightly closed and twisting his grass stained fingers together.
"I think I - I don't - I can't, Teddy."
"Can't what, mate?"
"Say it," James whispers.
Another sideways glance reveals that James' eyes are starting to swim with moisture. Teddy deliberately looks away to allow James time to dash the tears from his eyes before they start to fall.
"James, you can tell me anything, and I'll try to help you," Teddy promises and almost before he finishes the sentence James speaks, his voice barely audible.
"I think I like boys," he says, and he sounds so scared and alone and heartsick that Teddy's chest aches for him.
"Did you and Jack have a fight about that?" Teddy asks, concern flaring again and James shakes his head, flushing that dark red colour again.
"I like him," he whispers. "Teddy, I hate it! I don't - want to," he grits out and Teddy grabs his wrist gently as he starts worrying the lawn again.
"James, there's nothing wrong with it," he says gently.
"I know that’s what you’re supposed to say," James says, shaking his head, "but - I don’t - why me? What happened?"
"Nothing happened, mate, it's just - it's not something you have a choice about, and it's not something you should have to change even if that was possible.”
“It’s stupid,” James grits out.
“What is?”
“All of it! I don’t want to like anyone and it’s not like I want – I don’t even know – ” He’s an even darker red than before now, and he actually looks a little sick, so Teddy reaches over and lays a hand on his shoulder. James is so tense that he’s practically vibrating and Teddy squeezes his shoulder once before backing off a bit.
“Look, all I know is that there’s not a single thing wrong with you, James. If you ever want to talk to me – ”
James shakes his head fiercely and then a few seconds later, blurts out, “What am I going to do?”
“What about?” Teddy asks gently.
“Jack,” James says as though it’s obvious, and Teddy supposes it is really. Merlin knows there’s probably nothing more important to James right now. “I don’t – stupid sod’s not even – argh.”
“‘Argh’?” Teddy asks, and he can’t help a tiny smile.
“Yes, argh,” James says, reaching out to punch Teddy’s leg. “He likes girls, Teddy. A lot. They don’t like him cause he’s not even that good looking so I don’t know why I even care but he still follows them around all over the place and talks about them all the time and – it’s crap. I don’t know what to do.”
Teddy’s a little unsure what James means and says so, asking if he’s planning to tell Jack how he feels.
“Merlin, no!” James says vehemently. “I don’t even want to feel like it, let alone do anything about it. It’s just…difficult. Like it’s not even my thoughts, but I can’t help – it’s pretty gross, really.”
“No it’s not,” Teddy says with a gentle laugh. “Everything’s gross when you’re thirteen and have a crush on it.”
“It?” James says with a sudden grin. “You’re gross, Teddy. It? It like a Hippogriff or it like a chair?”
“You know what I mean. I know they’re your least favourite words ever, but when you're older, it won’t be so strange. I mean, it might still be strange but it won’t be gross."
"Huh," James grunts, evidently not believing him.
Teddy looks away and bites his lip for a moment, all too aware that this could backfire spectacularly. He probably shouldn't do it, but James just seems so desolate and different, as though he's pulled back from everyone and everything, as though he's smaller.
"Do you think I'm gross?" Teddy asks, still not looking at James.
"Yeah, Teddy. You like Hippogriffs," James jokes.
"James," Teddy says quietly. "Do you think there's something wrong with me?"
There's an increasingly heavy silence until understanding obviously dawns and James squeaks, "What? But - you - Victoire - "
"It's - complicated," Teddy shrugs. There's a limit to how much of himself he's willing to reveal, especially to an already confused thirteen year old. "I'm a bit stupid."
"Wow. Wow," James says. "I - huh… So - huh. This is so weird. I know this sounds really stupid but I kind of thought I was the only one. Even though I knew I wasn't."
"I know," Teddy agrees and James shakes his head in apparent amazement.
"Well," James says and Teddy's relieved to see the beginnings of a real smile on his face. "You're not a complete freak - " Teddy can't resist such an obvious cue and promptly rearranges his features to look like an old woman, complete with warts and rotting teeth. "Urgh. Except for that stuff, obviously," James grins.
"Feel better?" Teddy asks, reverting to his own face. "I know it doesn't help with Jack, but - "
"Loads better," James nods. "Thanks, Teddy."
"No problem," Teddy says. "Look, James. I haven’t told many people yet so can you keep this to yourself for a bit? Not for long," he adds at James' thoroughly put-out expression. "I want to tell your dad myself."
"Dad doesn't know?"
"Not yet."
"You told me first?"
"Well - not quite first, but yeah."
"Cool," James grins, and Teddy grabs him in a one armed hug and ruffles his hair. James hugs him back briefly then wriggles away. "Don't tell anyone about me," he says, as though struck suddenly by the thought.
"James. Of course not."
"You're the best," James says, bounding to his feet. "I'm hungry, come on."
Teddy shakes his head, wondering at the kid's resilience, and pushes himself upright, following James towards the house.
"Dad told you to talk to me, didn't he?" James asks as they approach the back door.
"Er - "
"I don't mind," James says. "I know I've been horrible."
"They’ve just been worried," Teddy says gently. "Just try to cheer up a bit, enjoy your summer."
"Yeah," James says, almost wistfully. Then he looks at Teddy with a thoughtful frown and says more definitely, "Yeah!"
Teddy ruffles his hair again and James ducks, shoving him in the side.
"Oi!" Teddy yells, and lunges for James who lets out a shout of laughter and dashes into the house, ducking behind his mum, who swats him away. He circles around her and out of the kitchen, laughing all the way.
Ginny looks at Teddy with raised eyebrows and a stunned expression.
“Miracle worker,” she says. “Sent by Merlin himself, I swear, you are. Anything you want for your birthday this year, honestly.”
Teddy just laughs and follows the sound of James, Lily and Albus’ burgeoning argument.
[Interlude 2]